Serenity of the Dark

What can I do to better myself?
I pulled the Knight of Swords, and 4 of Cups, Luxury. With the KoS I see myself taking on the opportunities that are presenting themselves to me. I have the mental capacity, I have the drive and the fortitude to get shit done. The 4 of Cups is the reward for all my hardworking and continue drive to push forwards through all these speedbumps that I have been tripping over and stumbling for the past few years.  

What can I learn from my past? 
7 of Disks, Failure.
Man was I familiar with that. From school, to relationships, to spiritual workings and my own way of feeling about myself. It was very intimate with me. Failure was something that I let run my life for up to 8 yeats, maybe a little more. And I made myself take on the burden of shit that I know for a fact was not my fault. Sure I had a part in it, but I let others energy, and their views of me make me miserable. I let myself be used and abused while being to afraid to actually speak up. But fuck that. Those days are over and I really am coming into my own a whole of a lot better than  I normally would have back then. Now it’s fuck everyone who ain’t feeding, fucking, or funding me. And at this point is only one person.  And his opinion and live is the only thing that matters to me.

What will today bring? 
5 of Disks,  Worry and 9 of Wands,  Strength.  Worry was had when the metro trains started kicking people off. I wanted to get home to do a few workings and was hoping I wouldn’t be exhausted in doing them.  Strength came from my other half who always manages to boost me up.  Providing me with energy to hello jump start my system when I’m seemingly on E. Wonderful combination. 

What weakens me in tarot?
Hangman, XII. It has to be at times I read to deep, meaning I am looking for more than is there. Sometimes I don’t look at the whole picture and focus on the bottom right hand corner, or the hand I see when,  I just need to let go and watch it unfold like I normally do. I could be flighty and dismiss a read because it seems trivial. When in actuality a small read, less information,  has so much more tell for me.

How is my growth in tarot?
My dogs were playing and they chose this card for me hours ago. I think it’s fitting.
X of Fortune. I am loving how I am interpreting my cards. I always go with the first feeling, if I need clarification I pull extra cards. Or if I feel like I need a greater explanation I’ll pull 3 or more. I am going to enjoy working with other decks as intimately I did with my Necro deck, and my feelings are syncing to this deck perfectly. I even thinking of getting back to reading for others. Working g greatly on that. They either take the readings as they are ir go some where. I’m not giving people what they want, they will just have to accept what it is. No skin off my back lol. Just as long as Gremory guides me and walks with me I am forever confident and building day to day.