As I sit outside in my red sweater, smoking my Black & Mild (regular of course), I am enveloped by the cold air, the impending Death of the leaves. I sniff the crisp air, and I feel that coldness sink down into my lungs, having me shiver just a little bit.
Thoughts move to Yule, and what I want, that will enhance my practice. I have been wanting a wood carving kit for a while now. I have grown quite an obsession for this art. I have wood planks and branches all over my house and in my shed. I have drawings on them waiting to be etched and them fed with my blood. Ideas pop into my mind daily.
I love the Winter (minus the snow). I love seeing the Death of life. Watching everything die slowly. This is the most transformative time of the year. Samhain has allowed you to be open to the veil, walk beyond what you don’t see, walk into the veil. Then continue that path into the yearly shedding of bullshit that we have unknowingly (or knowingly) carried with us for the past several months.
During this time I will be connecting deeply with Euryonmous. I have always delve deep into the Death, but deep enough for me to always have control. I never have allowed my guides to let me free fall and trust them (even though I trust them with everything else in my life). Still dealing with my own personal bullshit. A Necromancer that gate walks, does blood and chaos magick, but extremely strict and pigeon holds herself to not walking deeper, such total bullshit. But these next few weeks are going to change.
I pulled the Poised card from my Wisdom Oracle deck. Confirmation that all I have done, that I am ready to place my head deep under. I am ready to let that cold, bitter liquid into my mouth, down my lungs; cracking my chest open breaking free.
I walk with Belial, Bael, Beelzebuth/Beelzebub. Guarded by Apep and Anpu; intune with Hecate, Lilith and Satanas; surrounded by my Tribe and my Seven. I have been through the ringer, I have been fractured, I have been made Whole.
I am ready for Yule.